Wow. Spell that backwards. Wow. "Awesome".
No, this is not an entertainment arena, or so they claim; it's supposed to be a Church. And here is some stray correspondance caught between Psychiatrists which a proverbial bird dropped in my inbox.
This place, rocks, rolls, ducks and weaves all the hard questions thinking people ask of it - and smiles all the way to the bank. It uses psychiatric labour to cover it's songbooks at $20 per week, per worker, but none of these folks look real hungry, naked, or imprisoned to me. What about you, readers? Not a naked one in the bunch of 'em.
The HAMMER! has been to one of the 'serivces' here. Mr B. Huston (the younger; not the elder,[deceased 2004] who was forced to stand down because of accusations of child molestation - all very hush-hush - perpetrated in New Zealand http://www.smh.com.au/news/National/Hillsongs-true-believers/2004/11/06/1099547435083.html "Houston tackles criticism with the same gusto he applied to allegations that his father Frank had abused a child in New Zealand 30 years ago. He confronted his father, removed him from active ministry at Hillsong and then told his congregation... ") presides.
When was this dealt with?! This did NOT happen!!! To the inner sanctum, maybe. It's still spoken of in hushed tones. They should decry the fact their founder did this! Then again, it's no surprise that a denomination which was formed merely to get away from Black leadership after the 1917 Asuza Street Revival has morality problems seasonaly. (Yes; the Assembiles Of God was built on RACISM - Harvey Cox "Fire From Heaven".) Try finding a photo of Frank on Hillsong's website, or Google!!! Holy HUMBUG! Slicker than Jimmy Bakker!!!
Anyway, Brian spoke for 1 hour, 15 minutes uninterrupted, about money, before the word "Cheezus" was uttered. I wonder if the child Frank "allegedly" molested got any compensation? 30years later, this mob still have the claw outstretched, but almost have a media empire bigger than Bakker's! Justice done, and seen to be done? In Christ's case it was called "The Cross". In this case, Payola? Nepotism?
The names have been changed to protect the very guilty. In the letter, dummy!
Dr Allcock,
At first I must ask you for the password. Having dispensed with this privately, in your own mind, I ask you to pursue my recommendations below with the greatest zeal.
Pursuant to our previous conversation of the 06/06/06. Yes, I'm shopping early for Armageddon.
I have reviewed the data which you have sent me. The symptomatology is consistent with a number of readily- recognisable, socio-economic factors.
The lack of wealth in early childhood creates an inordinate desire for the accrual of it later in life. The lack of a musical bone in any of their bodies creates an acute desire to be able to sing, and publicly. This must be discouraged by rapid machine gun fire, if need be.
The need to justify one's inadequacies because of the relentless pursuit of both neurosis, and the concomitant arrival of the wealth generated by the zealous pursual of satisfaction for these broken needs, results in the formulation of a cluster of beliefs which entirely justify the complete enterprise of the 'Charismaniac'. Damn it, I'll die seeing this get into DSM V.
Prosperity Gospel. If you're rich your in, if you're poor, you're roasting - so go home until you take your pills (we don't need 'em cause there's nothing wrong with us!). More to be scolded than pitied.
I agree with the diagnosis, and prescribe seven Catholic masses per hour (excluding 4 hours constantly-disturbed sleep), in Latin, with as many Hail Mary's that can fit on the head of a pin. All musical accompaniment must be rendered through a 50,000 watt public address system by the Scottish bagpipes - without time for food or water. Above all; this disease must be eradicated with great enthusiasm!
If that doesn't work, slap 'em silly.
Oh; and a vat of Chivas Regal, 1827 wouldn't go astray, either. Send it to me later today, hic...
My best wishes in the treatment of this religious scourge which has broken out in your institution. Treat the victim vigorously, and with great dereliction. Remember; Jesus loves them. You don't have to LIKE them.
Dr Bliss MRANZCP, BscLd, PhDpsycho, BullShisenArtiste.
db23th@bigpond.net.au
PS My bill is in the mail. My beak is in the blender. I gave at the office. Most people I know, think that *I'm* crazy - the fools!
Delerious/Delerium - You Decide. Music for the Syntactically-Challenged Hillsong's UK Franchise Goes Bonkers for C-Rap (Christian Rap...you heard right). "Kulturprotestantism" at it's most Anxious, and Dying to Please!
The HAMMER! This doctor speaks truth; the doctor is wise.
In the above quoted SMH article, Brian protesteth that he worketh really hard, thus he needs the $650,000 apartment his efflusive wife has on Bondi Beach, and the Harley Davidson given by an American pastor for telling his congregation what they wanted to hear, and the multi-million dollar book and motivational speaking DVD contracts. Why such an expensive upper-class apartment on a Sydney beach suburb with the likes of Heath Ledger, and other media doyens? Later.
These people have MILLION dollar PLUS offerings PER SESSION, folks. Can you imagine what the Salvation Army could do with this money? Houston can't, I don't think he wants to, and when I last checked he was off on yet another ski holiday in Aspen - which is a heckova long way from 'beautiful (smarmy - his part of of the city maybe-) Sydney'.
Not only that. HOW DOES A CHRISTIAN PASTOR JUSTIFY HAVING HIS SON AND IMPRESSIONABLE FIANCE LIVING TOGETHER FOR MONTHS BEFORE THEY WERE MARRIED, AND TRAVEL THE WORLD WITH SAID HOUSTON SPACE CADET ACADEMY??? Ben Houston, married the attractive young Lucille, whilst still having logistical problems concerning which end of his hat is the right way around!
Now the Hustons can juggle this. They did with Frank. They did with Ben and Lucille (remarrying Lucille's Mother after she tossed her Psychiatric patient husband for a newer, saner model - holy upsizing batman!) and - oh - Lucille and Ben got the beach pad. Not bad for a starter home, what ho?
Brian; nepotism has its limits - even in the Kingdom of God! Avoiding the appearance of evil - hardly. Familial and croney indulgance - most definately. If Caligula came to Hillsong, and payed mega cesterces, would you marry him and his horse? Pornea is pornea, Brian - and you're a naughty boy. Marrying people who leave their sick husbands just for an out, is a no no. Chaperoning your son whilst he lives with his girlfriend before marriage is not righteousness seen to be done - and how good a chaperone are you? Heck - you work too hard!
My visit to Sydney's Hillsong? My companion asked me what I thought. I told them, as far as a Church is concerned, it was a fabulous gig. Sarchasm, people; sarchasm. (For US readers: Australian slang also renders "gig" as twerp, or fool.) All these people did was rant about their love for Jesus. I thought the Gospel according to Christian Scripture's emphasis was completely backward to this, self-aggrandising 'holiness' frenzy? In other words, the Gospel is the good news that God loves us - the UNlovable, and the UNloving. But then again, maybe these people are too busy singing to read Scripture. This reminds me of a piece of grafitti I saw in the early '80's. "Boy George missed the bus, 'cause he couldn't stop dancing." He was obviously not waiting for the ecclesiastical gravy train.
GUILTY of Ecclesiastical Humbuggery: Sentence Pending;
The HAMMER.
6 comments:
Look; I hear ya. I just dowloaded a heap of their whitey gospel music. Some of it was dead files. Dead files are 30 second grabs of tracks which record companies put on p2p networks to annoy people who get music for nothing. But, this is supposed to be a Church which is spreading the Gospel. Looks like Cheezus only saves you if you pay by Mastercard.
Good stuff.
Hello Dere,
Cheez, that was fast!
Indeed. I've had some of these files sent to me on CD's on playlists, but did not know that the Hillsong Enterprise were doing it. They are most annoying. This is utterly, absolutely disgusting; very distasteful to me, and nothing short of religious musical mercantile abomination. If you can not afford the price of a CD, they'll sabotage you hearing "the Word" for a few bucks?
Put a price on the words of the Good News at peril of your life and soul, fears I! J'accuse, Hillsong!
The HAMMER!
Lucille and Joel were living together before they got married? That's a lie! Hillsong would never allow it.
You'll rot in hell for this, you stupid man.
Joel is not married, his brother Ben is married to Lucille... it looks like this is just one of the uninformed 'facts' in this ridiculous post.
Where is this Joel/Ben stuff coming from? READ the actual article.
It seems like some of you Charismaniacs can't read. Either way - prove the HAMMER wrong.
Uninformed facts? That Frank Huston was stood down over child molestation allegations? That's from Brian's mouth - Sydney Morning Herald. That Ben and Lucille were living together before marriage - that's a primary source, so primary, it's LUDIKROUS.
That Lucille's mom ditched her last husband for a newer model? This is husband number THREE - and Jesus says that divorce is a no no.
That's from two primary sources, The Word, and someone who knows.
So what's your problem? Joel/Ben - either way, why are you fretting over the sins of 'The Cult of Personality'?
Contest the facts, brave Anonymous!
GUILTY: Case Closed.
The HAMMER!
Oh - the company Hillsong uses for it's songbook binding. PRA, or Psychiatric Rehabilitation Association. The workers are blessed if they get $20 per WEEK for their efforts - that is, if they are dilligent, and work hard.
That would not pay for Brian's rhinestone nasal hair clippers, would it?
The HAMMER!
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